#80: fucking guys with tatts, annie hamilton's writing & being catholic in spirit
sent from jewel's iphone with love
jewel:
I’m Jewel Nichols, writer and self-absorbed Sydney girl who’s had ten lives and has a penchant for being too open on the internet. I’ve been writing a memoir that’ll never get published because I can’t be fucked to edit it or force one of my friends to edit it.
I can say it chronicles significantly traumatic yet simultaneously hilarious life events like being kidnapped in Berlin, vomiting on a dick the first time I gave a blow job, spending a week in a psych ward and my year long high-functioning speed addiction.
I write about drugs and sex because it’s my reality, and the reality of a fucking huge portion of young people… despite what my psychiatrist says. “Not everyone does coke, Jewel.” She also told me I can’t have children with someone who is as mentally ill as me, because then my kids have a 100% chance of being as mentally ill as me. Okay, whatever. It’s not like mentally stable men aren’t a complete bore, or anything.
I like going to the hospital when I’m having a panic attack for a free valium, degenerates, talking about myself and overdosing on caffeine. I don’t like a lot of things (e.g. gin, minimalism, nose rings) but here are some other things I do…
#writer #bitch #icon
this is the online bit:
★ Valentin Neger’s Instagram ★
Valentin is a dear friend from Berlin who is a fashion designer and chronic Instagram poster. The first time I met him at a kick-on in a tattoo-studio-slash-flat he showed me a video of him replacing a Stone Island tee in the biggest department store in Germany with one of his own, then walking out with the Stone Island one. He’d live streamed it on Instagram. The next time we hung out he brought two pink and black Chanel carry-alls to my flat, filled with beers, clothes he’d made and prescription pills - loads of them. I love his unhinged antics and insane internet presence.
★ Annie Hamilton’s writing in general ★
Annie Hamilton is my second favourite writer and a micro celeb from NYC. She toes the line of being honest about being insufferable while being fascinating well, writing about her relationship with drugs, her pathological lying IRL, her insane dating life and her relationship with her dad. Two years ago she did this podcast which I LOVE.
A classic hit
★ F LIST ★
Meg Superstarprincess is my favourite blogger-come-micro-influencer. She arguably brought back Indie Sleaze and infamously broadcasted her bulimia recovery online. This video (which is kind of old but hey) is my favourite fashion week content ever and I watch it over and over to this day. She’s just so funny. I’d love to drink warm vodka in the street with her and crash b-grade fashion shows to interview fashion degenerates and wannabes.
this is the irl bit:
☆ Being ‘Sydney Sober’ ☆
There’s a fine line between self care and self destruction and I’ve been toeing it for 10+ years. Self destruction in the short-term is like self care because it feels so fucking good to be high, feels so fucking good to be drunk and feels so fucking good to be punched in the face, consensually (not by a Belarusian model in Milan because she sucked at it, but by a German guy I sold my prescription meds to one night). In the long-term self destruction is bad because a) your body hurts b) your relationships hurt and c) your bank account hurts. So, I’ve gone Sydney Sober as of one month, indefinitely. I don’t drink, I just chain smoke cigarettes and do teenie tiny lines of coke (sometimes). Speaking of coke, here’s my article “How To Get Free Coke” that I wrote for VICE. Take it how you will.
Love my fans <3
☆ Fucking guys with tattoos ☆
I physically cannot fuck men that have virgin skin. I find it repulsive. And I like guys with tattoos in Sydney because their traditional style tatts are fun to pay out. One guy I’m sleeping with said he didn’t like all my tattoos (of the euro-prison-tatt variety), so I said to him: “Oh what, do you have a cobweb on your elbow?” And he did. (When I told him I wrote something about him he was visibly pleased because initially he’d said he didn’t think he’d be interesting enough for that. No man is safe.)
☆ Being Catholic in spirit ☆
I’m Protestant but my spirit is Catholic. Being Catholic is sexy because you can essentially do what you want and still go to heaven as long as you confess, and collect pretty trinkets and jewellery. Obviously the Catholic church is fucked up but Spiritual Catholicism is separate from that. I’ll rock some cute rosary beads in honour of my spirit. Like one of my exes once said to me, quoting Mae West: “Good girls go to heaven, but bad girls go everywhere.” He has probably been the only man I’ve dated who supported (enabled) my ways, like leaving his flat for an hour to go to the “convenience store” which was really me meeting up with a guy in a bar downstairs and giving him head in the toilets. I told him the next day and he loved it (genuinely). I’m going to heaven, for sure.
A text from my friend, in for 2024
kiss kiss