vol #30: real housewives, faceless grindr profiles & quitting
sent from ky's iphone with love
ky:
Hello hello hello, I’m Ky, a proud Dharug and Kamilaroi diva and full time homosexual. I grew up in Blacktown but I currently live in the Inner West, the home of open relationships.
During the day I’m a journalist and writer. By night, I like to spend my time disassociating in Marrickville Metro Woolies.
Journalism is actually how I met the magnificent Joss. We worked and slayed at the same company. In my mind we are household names. In reality, we were just two gals working the for the man.
When I first met Joss, I think it was love at first sight. She was exuding a Tove Lo, Sylvia Plath, Joan Didion energy with a magnetising allure that caught this little gay freak hook line and sinker. Is that the expression? I don’t know fishing.
Unfortunately for you all, Joss has asked me to share my current musings with the world so strap yourselves in, I really don’t know what’s about to unfold.
okay diva!
this is the online bit
Real Housewives of
I think Reese Witherspoon said it best with ‘women’s stories matter’, and she’s right, they do.
On the surface, Real Housewives is about very wealthy, catty women traversing through life in their respective mansions in their respective cities. Under the surface, however, are incredibly nuanced discussions about power, wealth and women’s place in a male dominated capitalist world.
You see complex relationships unfold, how group dynamics constantly shift, the evolution of fashion, art, music and literature and even how society at large has changed throughout the seasons. It’s a show that my anthropological brain adores.
If you’re looking for some good seasons to start with, I’m always suggesting New York, Atlanta, Beverly Hills, Melbourne and Miami.
Faceless Grindr profiles
Spoiler alert: I am a homosexual. With that comes a little known, super niche, underground app called Grindr.
In just about every profile bio, however, there’s an acronym NPNC which is latin for ‘No pic no chat.’
You can look at the faceless Grindr profile with pity, knowing that the person behind the profile is probably either insecure about how they look or that they are still in the ‘closet’ or do what I do and look at them with awe and drunken possibility.
The reason why I love these faceless Grindr profiles is because more often than not, they’ll give me unsolicited compliments which far exceed those given to me by face profiles.
You just never know what or who might be hiding behind a faceless Grindr profile. It might be a secret admirer or the love of your life. More often than not it just ends up being a creep but the mystery is still captivating to me.
love is love!
Nick Tiffany Vogue 73 Questions
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If Nick Tiffany hasn’t graced your TikTok fyp page yet, summon them into your life.
Nick’s mock Vogue 73 questions videos are my favourite things on the internet at the moment. Nothing prepares you for how Nick answers the questions while touring a home I don’t know if it is theirs or not in a Taylor Swift shirt.
Here are some of their answers.
Filler or botox?
Taxidermy
Something that never goes out of style?
Generational wealth
Who’s a woman you look up to?
My husband’s mistress
Talk about creative genius. The mind is such a powerful place.
this is the irl bit
Quitting (or having a break)
Recently, I took the advice of a close friend Beyoncé and quit my job. As such, I now have a month off before I start my next job (a luxury yes).
I’m a perfectionist (guilty!) which means the thought of quitting something actually makes me want to vomit but it came to a point where my life was being overrun by a job that no longer fulfilled me.
I’m not saying you should quit your job, unless you want to. But what I can recommend is that if there’s something in your life that is robbing you of your peace and joy and you don’t see it having a genuine positive impact in your life then quit!
Having the break from work means I can now find a version of myself that’s not attached to a job. It also means that I have the ability to refocus myself on what actually does matter to me.
So whether it’s a job, a sport, a relationship or a hobby, if quitting is going to make an improvement to your wellbeing, then do it. Don’t stay in something longer than you can handle just because it’s taboo to quit things.
Eating alone
I’m someone who used to be incredibly afraid of being alone but after a stint of failed romances I found myself alone quite a lot (by force).
What made me fall in love with being on my own and enjoying my own company was going out and eating alone. For the first five times I did this, I absolutely hated it and felt like a freak.
But the more I forced myself to go to cafés and restaurants alone, the more I found myself enjoying the solitude. I can order what I want, I can flirt with the staff and I can people watch. More importantly, I can be alone with myself and not have to perform for another person.
It’s quite a liberating experience. I recommend everyone try it out.
Being smartwatch free
For some reason, I have like six smartwatches. Recently, however, I’ve found myself not wearing them at all.
I already have my phone so I don’t need another device showing me notifications and pulling me out of my day. I also found that without the watches, I have stopped obsessing over how many steps I’ve done, how many calories I’ve burnt and I’ve been less harsh on my body.
I’m not saying not having a smartwatch will wash away every body image issue you have, because it won’t, but for me it’s provided a little more distance between my inner critic and the body I see in the mirror.
smell you later!